Why do I deny falling asleep when watching TV?
Is it just me or when you’re watching a film or a TV programme at home and you start nodding off, your better half nudges you and says, “Are you asleep?” or, “Why are you sleeping?”; you instantly deny it?
For some strange reason, my initial reaction is always to respond with, “No, I am not”, even though it’s quite clear to everyone that I was - not least because I was snoring. I instantly jump on the defensive to something which, when you think about it, doesn’t matter in the slightest.
Why don’t I just say, “Yeah I fell asleep, I went out last night and I still feel rough” or “I’ve had a busy week and I’m shattered”, or “This film is really not doing it for me and a little power snooze seemed like a more attractive alternative”.
They all seem like perfectly reasonable responses and yet my natural instinct is to flatly deny closing my eyes even for a second.
The same applies to when someone asks you if you’re drunk. It is categorically impossible to concede that you are - and not necessarily because you’re incapable of formulating a response. It’s just another of those questions that seems to bring the old defence mechanism into play, even when it’s blatantly clear to all – not least yourself - that you’re totally and utterly trousered. We’re odd aren’t we?
Or maybe it is just me.
So then I started to wonder what else do we deny? Particularly, what other things do we irrationally deny, without any logic or reason.
After many years of dealing with the public I have noticed that a lot of people – many of our clients and myself included - deny a multitude of other things illogically and unnecessarily. Here are just 5 headline examples to kick us off…
- That insuring against your own death or illness is imperative because it is a valid expense even if you do not ever use it.
- As I write that out I realise just how mad an attitude it is to deny that logic and yet many of us do. The reality is that it is the best and most sensible outlay you can make that you hope never to actually have to use.
- That Brexit will not matter to your investment return.
- It won’t. I mean, it might do, a little bit, but only in the short term (and no one really knows) and yet so many people are put off investing because of the perceived uncertainty. Like every other newsflash story in the past 150 years, this will pass and life will move along, all the while stock markets will continue to advance over the many decades to come. As they have always done.
- That it’s not generally possible to be clever and play the markets by buying low and getting out high.
- As I include this one, I realise this requires a whole blog on its own (I’m adding it to the list as I type!), but to summarise, this is not clever and is impossible to consistently achieve. It is about "Time-In the Markets" not "Timing the Markets"
- You should invest into a pension at the earliest opportunity.
- Some people think that it’s not worth investing into a pension until they are in their late 30s or even older, i.e. closer to the time that they’re actually going to need it, which is nonsense. Pensions have many benefits (see previous blog) but one key advantage is that they give you tax relief which is effectively free money. Also, if you’re a business owner, you can invest into a pension personally and claim it as a business expense, thus saving you Corporation Tax. More free money. Hmmmmmm Free Money.
- That cost is what you pay and value is what you get.
- Logically I think we all know this but a lot of people see it the other way around. I see more and more people challenging the price of something without considering its value. Or kidding themselves into really wanting something fancy and expensive, when it adds no real value to them or their lives.
There are a load more. In fact I had almost 20 knocked up in a 40 minute brainstorm and I will be sharing these with you lucky people later on down the line.
Tell me, what is it that you continue to deny, although you know deep down that it’s true? More importantly, what do you deny that is really true and yet that denial is negatively impacting your long term ambitions. I bet there are a few.
Alfie Mullan, May 2019
Want to hold a conversation that will quite literally change your life? Well drop me an email and we can get this new life on the road.